'm not at all this type of person and the worse part is that he doesnt and wont ever know it. I am 23 years old, always a good student, working since age 16, never fooling around with men, always respected myself and others. Always admired by the people who know me because of that. I've only had 2 boyfriends in my life since I couldnt find the right person. I had been by myself for almost three years until a few months ago when I met this man Im seeing right now. We went out for about 2 weeks and stopped talking for about 2 months. Now he is been back again for about 2 weeks and I have let myself be driven by my emotions. We have been very intimate (except for intercourse). We have hung out about everyday since he's been back and almost acting like a couple. Truth is that I have felt overwhelmingly lonely for the past year and it's been killing me inside. I barely have any friends. The man I have cared about the most in life has found his other half and they are expecting a baby now. I feel that something inside says that I want to try something serious with this person im seeing now, but at the same time he is too young and because of that most likely not willing to compromise...especially given the circumstances. Im thinking he might be waiting for me to sleep with him and then he will distance himself again and for ever. I know that he has a lot of girl friends and that he wont give that up so now I feel like a total SL*T. I had never felt like this in my entire life and the embarrassment and disappointment in myself is so big that there is nobody on this entire planet that I would dare communicate these feelings to. I had waited so long to find the person to see how much Im worth, but I have blown it off myself by acting like this, I feel I have lost so much value as a woman. Now, I think about it and wonder if I would be one of those people who look at the past full of regrets. How do I walk around the street now thinking that this man could be telling the world what big of a SL*T I am and the things we have done together (we go to the same university). Someone please enlighten me? What do i do to feel better? How to cope? Any constructive opinions would be highly appreciated.