It's something I've never talked to anyone about before because it's just unexplainable but I guess I should try. I can just tell I've got something mentally wrong with me. The first time I tried to commit suicide was when I was 9. I've been to 3 or 4 different councellors (including school) but they've all dropped me after months/up to a year because they can't help me any further. My parents recently split and there is no way we can afford a psychiatrist, we can barely afford to pay the power bills. I'm always paranoid that I see ghosts, that my hands aren't clean enough, that I'm going to throw up and a bunch of little things. My mood goes up and down and I have been diagnosed as depressed since I was 8, (I'm 16 now). There is so much I need to explain but can't explain in this box but I just need some ideas or other cheap/free ways to talk to psychiatrists, councellors etc. Thanks.